Wedding (Guide)

"Will you marry me?" - Once this question has been answered with "yes", the bride and groom have a lot of organizational work to do. Our guide will help you to keep track of the wedding jungle and gives you useful tips about weddings. We wish you an unforgettable day and lots of fun while getting married!

Wedding planner or sustainable DIY wedding?

The wish of many wedding couples is to enjoy a happy and relaxed wedding day. But on the way to this goal many stumbling blocks may occur, which a wedding planner can remove - after all, a wedding planner is a wedding professional. He has an excellent network of cooperation partners at his disposal and can be an important help for the bridal couple from the choice of location and menu design to the search for the right DJ.

The wedding planner works in the background and keeps the bridal couple's back free so that they can concentrate on themselves and, of course, on their guests. Although this sounds tempting, it should be remembered that the commitment of a wedding planner generally accounts for about 10 to 20 percent of the total wedding budget. On the other hand, he can often negotiate discounts due to his good contacts to service providers. A more cost-effective option is to engage the wedding professional only for individual areas and in any case to agree on a fixed price. In a preliminary consultation, all questions can be discussed.

Many bridal couples deliberately choose a DIY wedding. Such self-organised weddings are not only absolutely in vogue, but also give couples complete control to ensure that their wedding is truly the most beautiful day of their lives. We have put together a few ideas below.

1. Stationery: The save-the-date cards, invitations, menu and place cards can be completely self-designed with a little creative skill. If calligraphy is a talent, the name cards can also be written personally. Simply order the cards in the same design as the other wedding stationery and add the names of the guests yourself. Tip: Since it can happen that you make a mistake, it is best to order a certain number of extra cards right away. It saves time, money and nerves, as the cards do not have to be reordered and no additional shipping costs are incurred.

2. Wedding ceremony: classic car, van, carriage and co. Even the drive to the ceremony can be a highlight of the wedding. Therefore, the "wedding car" should match the bridal couple. In addition to choosing the right vehicle, the floral decorations should also match. You can easily make these yourself from your favourite flowers. The wedding venue can also be set in an atmospheric scene, for example with a self-designed flower decoration or self-made lanterns that are colour-coordinated with the other decorations. The ring pillow should also be chosen carefully, as it bears the most important symbols of the day. You can also make or upgrade it yourself - depending on the theme and type of wedding..

3. Reception: The reception offers time to talk and prepare the guests for the celebration. In addition to sparkling wine and orange juice, a bridal couple created drink can be served.

4. Flowers: Flowers as decorative elements are a common thread throughout a wedding. Whether bridal bouquet, car or table decoration - whatever you like is allowed. Since self-tying is very time-consuming, you should contact your florist in advance and coordinate exactly what you have in mind..

5. Location: Couples spend a lot of time finding the perfect location for their wedding reception. It is not only logical that it should provide the right ambience and a wow effect on the big day. Through personal and self-made decoration elements, the banqueting hall, the restaurant or the garden pavilion becomes an unforgettable location. This is ensured by colour-coordinated flower arrangements and lovingly designed lighting elements. Also in vogue and perfect for the DIY trend are fairy lights in empty wine bottles. You can also make your own orientation plan so that guests know where to find what in the location. Meaningful symbols then show the way to the bar, dance floor etc. on the outline of the location. The tables look particularly festive with decorations that match the theme of the wedding. For a summer wedding, for example, this could be shells and Turkish glass stones with matching candlesticks. The chairs can be decorated with slipcovers. The dance floor looks particularly inviting with atmospheric lights, such as lanterns or lampions.

6. Food and drinks: Before and after the actual meal, small snacks are always a good idea. There are now numerous solutions for this, such as a food truck, an ice cream van or a candy and juice bar. If the food should also be homemade, a buffet of finger food and dips is a good idea. The highlight is, of course, the wedding cake. There are already many videos about how to bake it yourself. You can find the right cake decorations in specialist shops or online.

7. Entertainment: A good wedding party also needs a certain amount of entertainment. This can be classic dances, a quiz by the best men, a video slideshow with the couple's best moments or old-fashioned wedding games.

8. Mementos: Pictures and videos are an excellent way to look back on the day, even after many years. In addition to professional photos and a wedding video, you can also distribute disposable cameras on the tables for guests to capture funny moments of the celebration and take snapshots spontaneously. This is how vivid memories are created. Even before the wedding, there are a few dates that are worth recording. Why not create a personal hashtag on Instagram and share it with the wedding guests? A classic wedding newspaper is perfect for compiling everything important for the guests. It can include the agenda, contact persons, fun facts about the bride and groom and much more.

The topic of sustainability has now led to a rethink in many areas of life. Ecological aspects are also becoming increasingly important in wedding planning.

Registry office and church?

In 2019, June followed by August and May, were the most popular marriage month

Marriage banns - that's a thing of the past

For reasons of data protection, banns have been a thing of the past since July 1, 1998 and are now called registration for marriage. This registration for the marriage at the registry office - of the place of residence of the bride or groom - can take place at the earliest six months before the wedding ceremony and remains valid also only six months. Even if the registration for the marriage is necessary at a certain registry office, one can freely choose the desired place for the wedding ceremony. Many registry offices offer wedding ceremonies on board of a ship, in a castle, on a lighthouse or other special places. Just ask.

Witnesses are no longer an obligation, but still a beautiful tradition

Necessary documents for the civil wedding ceremony

In case that both partners are German citizens and of age, have not been married yet and do not have underaged children, the following documents must be brought along:

• Proof of identity (valid identity card or passport)
• Registration or residence certificate issued by the registration authority. Available at the registry office of the main residence
• Certified copy of the birth record from the registry office of the place of birth

Required documents for the church wedding ceremony

Many couples also want the church blessing for their marriage. If the bride and groom have different denominations, there are some things to consider. A couple can be married in both a Protestant and a Catholic church - provided that one of the partners belongs to one of the two denominations. It is also possible to have an ecumenical wedding performed by an evangelical and a catholic minister.

The formalities can vary from parish to parish, so it is advisable to have a briefing at the parish office. For example, a dimissoriale may be required. This is the parish priest's permission if you want to get married in another parish.

The following documents are required:

• Proof of identity (valid identity card or passport)
• Baptism certificate with single certificate (not older than six months)
• Marriage certificate from the registry office or registration for marriage
• Confirmation certificate of the evangelical partner
• Confirmation certificate of the catholic partner

The choice of the surname: Name right

About 80 % choose the surname of the man, whereas only about 5 % choose the surname of the woman

The guest list

Some bridal couples dream of a big party with all their friends, relatives and acquaintances. Others, on the other hand, prefer a small celebration with the closest family and circle of friends. The size of the wedding ceremony depends primarily on the budget. It is best to start with those people who should definitely take part in the wedding. Furthermore, one should honestly ask oneself: with whom do we spend time throughout the year, who is close to us? Of course, you don't want to discriminate against anybody and a certain tact is required. But it's best to listen to your inner voice: Who would you invite out of sheer commitment and who do you really care about spending a particularly important day with?

The party location

One of the most important questions in wedding planning is: How many guests should we celebrate with? At best, the question is answered in advance, when writing the guest list and invitations, but it is gaining importance once again when searching for a suitable party location. Whether it be an elegant castle wedding, an outdoor party, a stylish restaurant, a barn or a country inn - the location should first and foremost please the bridal couple. But of course the guests should feel comfortable as well. Therefore, several points have to be taken into account:

• Beautiful restaurants are often booked out early. Timely planning (about 9-12 months in advance) is therefore important.
• Are the rooms suitable for the size of the wedding party and also easily accessible for wheelchair users, prams and elderly people?
• Is there a play corner for children and retreat facilities if a guest wishes to take a break?
• Is the distance between the wedding ceremony location and the party location relatively close?
• Are there enough parking spaces available?
• Are there any overnight accommodations on site or nearby?
• Is external catering possible?
• It is best to arrange at least one appointment for a rehearsal dinner.
• Obtain precise information on the total costs (space rental, decoration, food and drinks, service, cleaning, etc.).

Invitations: from the Save-the-Date to the Thank-You Card

Planning a wedding is a comprehensive and multifaceted task. In addition to choosing the location, the outfits and the rings, great attention should also be paid to the stationery.

Save-The-Date Cards

Once you have decided on the wedding date, the guest list and the location, you can send out the invitations. But what if the location has not yet been decided? In this case, it makes sense to send out save-the-date cards. These cards simply contain the information that a couple intends to get married and the date of the wedding. The advantage of this is that guests can include this date in their planning in good time. Especially if the wedding date should fall in the holiday season, a save-the-date card is an important measure to risk as few cancellations as possible. The cards can be sent out approximately 10 months in advance.

Invitations and Co.

You can then take your time to design the actual invitations and send them about 3 to 5 months before the party. So you are on the safe side. For the design of the invitations, place cards, menu cards and thank you cards, you should ideally hire a related graphic designer or one who is a friend. But you can also find many portals with design ideas and inexpensive printers online.

Information that an invitation card should contain

Guest gifts

The date for the wedding has been set, the location booked and the wedding dance rehearsed. In all the hustle and bustle, the guest gifts often get lost in the shuffle. However, many of your friends were involved in making the wedding an unforgettable day and deserve a "thank you". For bridesmaids and flower girls, for example, bracelets with an individual engraving are a good way to remind them of this special day. For the other guests, jars of jam with the name of the guest, the bride and groom and the wedding date are particularly popular.

An absolute classic among the guest gifts are wedding almonds. Exactly 5 almonds are packed in a bag for each guest and symbolise health, prosperity, fertility, happiness and a long life. Even more personal are fortune biscuits, to thank your guests for coming. There are no limits to creativity: Small vouchers and self-formulated wishes are also possible..

Thank you cards

The classic way of thanking guests for their presence, help and gifts after the wedding is the thank you card. It can be designed according to your own wishes and ideas. In addition to warm words, it often shows a best of the wedding pictures taken. It is therefore important to check with the photographer how quickly you can receive it, as it will take time to process all the pictures.

Thank you cards are usually sent around six weeks after the wedding

What's for dinner and where are we sitting?

After the wedding ceremony is before the party! Many guests are certainly already looking forward to the meal and to nice conversations with their table neighbours. The seating arrangement is therefore an important point in the planning and should be well thought out. The topic of food is also an essential point of the wedding celebration. The question is not only what to serve, but also in what form. More information can be found in the following paragraphs.

Seating arrangements & table shapes

At such a special celebration like a wedding, every guest should get a proper seat. The planning of the seating arrangements, i.e. which persons sit together at a table, and the forms in which the tables are arranged, can, however, prove to be relatively complicated. First of all, both depend on the length of the guest list and the size of the respective room. The tables can be T, U or E shaped. The T-shape is ideal for smaller wedding parties. The table of the bridal couple and the table with the guests together form the letter "T" - hence the term "T-shape". Round tables or long tables are also beautiful. Mixed forms are also possible - for example, the bridal couple sits at a table at the head of the room, while the guests are grouped around the bridal couple according to their degree of kinship and relationship at tables.

The E-shape is a variation of the U-shape. In this arrangement, the bride and groom's table is supplemented by three further tables, whereas in the U-shape only two tables are placed at both ends. In both forms, it should be ensured that guests sitting with their backs to each other have sufficient legroom and space to stand up. If there are no disturbing table legs in the way, this also contributes to the guests sitting comfortably.

Place of honour for the bride and groom

In the past, the seating arrangements at a wedding followed relatively rigid rules, but these have now been relaxed. However, certain traditions are still mostly cultivated today. The central focus of the seating arrangement is the bridal couple. The bride traditionally sits on the groom's right side and the bride's mother on the groom's left side. The groom's father sits next to the bride. Their partners sit next to the bride's mother and the bridegroom's father. If the table is large enough, grandparents, witnesses and siblings can also sit at it.

Tips for seating arrangements

• Thanks to place cards and an overview in the entrance area the guests find their place without any problems
• In principle, the family has priority over friends: the closer the degree of kinship or the relationship of a guest to the bride or groom is, the closer he or she sits to the bridal couple
• Put together guests who already know each other or who have similar interests, so that stimulating conversations can develop.
• Trust in the fact that after the meal - with the beginning of the music - the society mixes by itself and changes places anyways

The champagne reception

The party menu

What is to be served and in what form? Especially at weddings with many guests, it is almost impossible to meet everyone's taste. Nevertheless, every effort is made to satisfy every guest. A special offer for allergy sufferers, vegetarians and vegans should be a matter of course. The wishes of the younger guests should also be taken into account. Children are often less enthusiastic about exotic and noble delicacies and instead much prefer schnitzel and chips or pasta with tomato sauce..

Menu vs. buffet - pro and contra

Whether it's Asian, Mediterranean or bourgeois cuisine, it's ultimately up to each bridal couple to decide for themselves. Also for the presentation of the food each bridal couple probably has its own ideas. Multi-course menu or rich buffet? Here is a comparison of some advantages and disadvantages:

Mixed forms of menu and buffet

As a compromise, the bridal couple can also opt for a mix of menu and buffet. For example, starters, snacks and main courses can be served to the table and the dessert can be served in the form of a buffet. Another option is to serve the starters in the form of a buffet.

Selection of drinks

The matching drinks round off a successful festive menu. It is advisable to put together a smaller selection of wines in advance. From this selection, the guests can then decide individually which wine they would like to drink with the individual dishes. The basic rule is still: "white wine with white meat and fish, red wine with red meat". Of course, mineral water, lemonade, beer and juices should also be included in the drinks. By the way, it is advisable to check with the restaurant or catering service in advance which drinks are included in the agreed flat rate. This is the only way to keep track of the costs. If you have bought the drinks yourself from the retailer on commission, you can return the originally sealed remaining quantity of drinks.

The wedding cake

Cutting and feeding

The wedding cake is of course being cut by the bridal couple. The bride and groom cut the bottom layer of the cake together. The one whose hand is on top is supposed to have the upper hand in marriage as well. The bride and groom eat the first piece together by feeding each other what is supposed to symbolize the mutual care of the future spouses.

Do not consume the top layer of the cake immediately

The top layer of the wedding cake should not be eaten immediately, but should be frozen. It is supposed to bring good luck to eat a part of it on the first wedding day and another part on the baptism of the first child.

When is the right time to cut the wedding cake?

Depending on the course of the wedding, the wedding cake can be cut at different times. If there is to be coffee and cake in the afternoon, it is a good idea to cut the wedding cake as well. The opening of the dessert buffet in the evening is also a nice opportunity. If the weather plays along and the reception takes place in the open air, then it is also very nice to cut the cake immediately after the wedding ceremony at the champagne reception. At midnight there is another opportunity, as the starting signal or the crowning finale of the midnight buffet.

A dream in white: the wedding dress

White is the first choice for the colour of wedding dresses. However, this was not always the case. Especially brides of the middle and lower classes could not afford special clothing and wore their best dress at their wedding until the 20th century, predominantly their Sunday dress or Sunday costume. As can be seen on wedding photographs from that time, the dress was often high-necked and black or in the colours of the respective regional costume. White, the colour of purity and innocence, only slowly became the preferred colour for wedding dresses at the beginning of the 19th century. The model for this were aristocratic and royal houses. One of the most famous wedding dresses to this day is the dress of the Empress of Austria: Sissi. Many girls and women still dream of such a dream in white with a long train, in which she said yes to the proposal of Emperor Franz Joseph I in 1854.

54 % of all brides in Germany are getting married in a white wedding dress

However, white is not white because there are numerous colour gradations - for example off-white, ivory, wool white or cream. In addition, there are the different cuts and styles of the dresses, some of which emphasize female shapes particularly beautifully. Below are some different figure types with recommendations for the style of dress.

Wedding customs: "something old, something new …"

But the outfit of a bride is only completed with those accessories, which originally go back to an English custom: "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue and a lucky six-pence in your shoe". "Something old", which for example can be represented by a piece of family jewellery, stands for the life of the bride before her marriage. With the foundation of a family, a new phase of life begins: "something new" symbolizes, for example, the new wedding dress. Luck is supposed to bring "something borrowed." If the bride borrows the handbag of a happily married girlfriend, for example, this happiness should pass to the future spouses. Finally, the bride needs "something blue" as a sign of loyalty, a blue garter is often worn. The lucky penny falls generously under the table today - it would probably also be too uncomfortable in the shoe.

The rings - 5 basic tips for buying a wedding ring

The wedding rings accompany a couple for life at best. The ring swap is one of the most emotional moments during a wedding, because the rings are visible symbols of the love and affection of the bride and groom. The purchase of the important rings should therefore be well planned and thought through. Requirements and selection criteria with regard to the wedding rings are among other things the design, the wearing comfort and not least the price. The following tips are intended to make buying a wedding ring easier.

By the way, in Germany you wear the wedding ring on your right hand.

Erasable memories: Photography and filming

The photographer

A shooting with a professional photographer is a standard part of many weddings today. Of course, one would not want to miss out on beautiful photographs as a souvenir of this big day. The photographer is often hired on the basis of good experience. You should start looking for the right photographer for your wedding as early as possible. Many good photographers are already booked up more than a year in advance - especially on popular days for a wedding. Perhaps the bride and groom have had this experience personally or rely on word-of-mouth recommendations from friends or relatives. But an internet search for regional photo professionals can also be useful. However, you should not rely exclusively on the website and the pictures shown there, as often only the best-of pictures can be found there. It is more advisable to have a complete reportage shown to you in a personal meeting.

Unique pictures of a unique festival

For a successful shooting the photographer and the bridal couple should be sympathetic. So if you don't already know each other, a date to get to know each other is very helpful. The time schedule can also be clarified - depending on whether the photographer is only to take certain photos or whether the entire day is to be accompanied photographically by the photographer. As is so often the case, this is also a question of cost. It is therefore advisable to obtain and compare several offers. It is also important to insist on a written contract that specifies exactly what the bride and groom want and what is to be shot.

Avoid time wasters

Once the right photographer has been found, details can be discussed - for example, moments that should definitely be photographed: for example, the moment when the couple sees each other as bride and groom for the first time (First Look), the exchange of rings, the congratulations of the guests after the wedding ceremony or the opening dance. Many bridal couples anticipate the portraits that will be taken during the individual shoot with the photographer with great excitement. To ensure that the suspense does not turn into tension, enough time should be planned: at least 1 to 2 hours. Avoidable time wasters can be identified in advance. For example, it is better not to have to drive too far to the photo location. The timing of the wedding shoot is also very important and depends on individual factors. Ideally, however, the guests are not left to their own devices, but are entertained or occupied themselves: with a tour of the castle, the champagne reception or coffee and cake. Due to the light conditions, a shooting directly after the wedding ceremony is not always advisable. The best light often comes in the early evening hours. In the hour before sunset (golden hour) everything is bathed in a warm light, which has a very flattering effect on pictures.

The videographer or wedding filmmaker

In addition to photos, films are also a great way to recall the most beautiful moments of your wedding again and again. Therefore, a videographer can also be commissioned to record these special moments with his camera. The search for a good wedding filmmaker can also lead to success via the Internet or the exchange of experiences with friends and relatives. Demo versions on the filmmaker's homepage, in which he proves his skills, can also serve as a decision-making aid. Of course, films have one decisive advantage over photos: the sound. Speeches, wedding games, the cutting of the wedding cake - everything can be filmed and recorded for eternity. It is advantageous if these highlights are added to the main movie as a separate clip. Then the viewer can select later in the menu which passages of the celebration he would like to see in full length. The final result is an approximately one-hour report of the wedding, which is edited and reworked afterwards, if the filmmaker is present for approximately 10 hours. A very individual souvenir.

The bridal bouquet - popular bouquet shapes

It is not only in front of the wedding altar or during the romantic opening dance that the bride and groom are in the centre of attention and is therefore an important accessory - the bridal bouquet. His choice should therefore also be given appropriate attention. The bouquet should match the wedding dress and underline the type of the wearer. Whether in a waterfall look or as a colourful flower ball made of gerbera, roses or hydrangeas - the design possibilities are huge.

Who's gonna catch the bouquet?

One of the highlights of a wedding celebration is the tradition of throwing bridal bouquets. All unmarried women gather near the bride. The bride stands with her back to the crowd and throws the bouquet - without looking. The woman who catches the bouquet is the next bride. But because a bridal bouquet is actually too good to fall victim to the bridal bouquet throwing, some brides use a trick: they have a substitute bouquet made. They then use this "twin" as a throwing object and keep the actual bouquet as a memento.

The music: live band or DJ?

The mood of a wedding celebration depends essentially on the musical entertainment. Therefore it is important to think about a DJ or a live band in advance. Are the wedding date and the celebration location fixed? Then you should search as soon as possible, because good entertainers have a relatively full schedule. When it comes to choosing a DJ or a band, there are three things that are decisive: the question of personal taste, the budget and the size of the location. But what exactly speaks for or against a live band or a DJ?

Whether live band or DJ - it is important to have a varied selection of music. As far as possible, every age group should be addressed so that every guest has musical and dancing fun and gets their rewards. And another little tip: In order not to disturb the visual appearance of the location too much, you should talk to the band or DJ about the banners and their placement beforehand. Of course, they want to advertise themselves and their work, but a large banner right behind the bridal couple could be perceived as disturbing - also in the pictures.

The opening dance

For dance buffs, it may be the cause of sleepless nights, but the opening dance is and remains a very romantic custom and a permanent item on the programme of many weddings. Many dance schools offer courses for wedding couples.

A small selection of wedding songs:

When it comes to the wedding song, apart from individual taste, the type of dance is also decisive. Is there perhaps a personal song for getting to know each other? Whether it will ultimately be a classical waltz or a hip-hop song, this can only be decided by the respective couple.

ArtistSong

• Bruno MarsMarry You
• Elton JohnCan You Feel The Love Tonight
• Diana Ross & Lionel RichieEndless Love
• Sonny & CherI Got You Babe
• Aretha FranklinI Say A Little Prayer
• AdeleOne And Only
• ElvisLove Me Tender
• The TemptationsMy Girl
• Whitney HoustonOne Moment In Time
• Alanis MorissetteThank You
• Mario JordanWelch Ein Tag
• John LegendAll Of Me
• Josh GrobanYou Raise Me Up
• Etta JamesAt Last
• Lady Gaga & Bradley CooperShallow
• Sixpence None The RicherKiss Me
• Johannes OerdingFür Immer Ab Jetzt

Where do you want to go? Dream destinations for your honeymoon

Stroll hand in hand for miles along the white sandy beach, enjoy togetherness and relax. The honeymoon is supposed to be the crowning conclusion of a wedding and is therefore associated with many longings and desires. But where is the journey to go?

Popular honeymoon destinations include the Seychelles or Maldives, Bali or Mauritius. But even a city trip to Paris has its charm. So first of all the type of trip has to be clarified. Newlyweds with a passion for sports might be interested in an active holiday with diving offers. On a cruise, several destinations can be explored during shore excursions. Between shore excursions, you can pamper yourself with the wellness offers on board. Our tip: When booking, tell or write that it is a honeymoon or the Honey Moon. Often you will receive a small gift on arrival.

Depending on the destination, jet lag may have to be considered due to time change and possible rainy seasons. It is therefore important to obtain information about the weather of the desired destination and period. Not only the wallet is happy about special honeymoon offers from certain tour operators. Such specials are especially designed to meet the needs of newly married couples. So that nothing stands in the way of an unforgettable honeymoon.

Sources

• destatis.de
• statista.com
• sueddeutsche.de
• wikipedia.de
• weddix.de
• hochzeit-perfekt-geplant.de
• hochzeitsplaza.de
• freepik.com

Image Sources

• Main picture above (couple, man and woman): iStock.com/Halfpoint
• Illustrations: freepik.com
• Banner with link to the wedding ring guide: iStock.com/Halfpoint